I never want to be the girl a guy thinks he scored.  I never want to be the best he thinks  he can do.

Nothing I am is the best of me.

I am something. I am not the best of me.

There is so much I want to  be and so much I am unsure of.

I want to be powerful and smart and determined. How do you be those thing and be loved?

Nothing in Texas tells me I can be those things. What I see is family, conservativism,  seriousness, denial…not life.

I want to understand life for what I grew up believing. I grew up believing in individuality, personal responsibility,  and a desire for better.

I need to reach a point where giving back is a requirement, not a desire. A point where life may not be what I expected, but where the best is expected of me.

Anything less than the most seems like a cop-out. Anything worth its salt seems difficult.

There is so much more I can give.


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